In early 2018, I had the pleasure to partner with several relationship coaches as well as podcasts to discuss one of my areas of expertise which was the process of preparing internally for dating success and how powerful a dating mindset for success can be in attracting the love and right relationship that you deeply desire.
The topic of a recent video series where I served as a guest expert with Kowalke Coaching focused for this session will be "Getting Yourself Ready For Successful Dating". In this video series, I shared advice for singles on ways to prepare internally for dating before you begin your journey of finding lasting love. The first step I take with any client is to help them get clear on the type of partner they desire to attract and I shared my methodology in a recent episode of the "Talking Love Show" with Host Peter Kowalke. If you find yourself stuck attracting the wrong kind of man/woman each time, it is worth taking a few minutes to put pen to paper to better define the type of person you deeply desire to attract and date, rather than just being open to dating anyone who catches your eye but isn't really intriguing, interesting, or even a good fit. List out the characteristics, traits, values, beliefs, common interests, and any non-negotiable terms that would be deal breakers. You can, of course, list some physical traits but I encourage you to think about how incredibly fulfilling a relationship would be with a partner who shared some of the same interests, values, beliefs, desires to have or not to have children, and how this relationship enhances and fulfills you, not only on a physical level but on an emotional level as well.
As a coach for ambitious, successful, relationship-ready single men and women, there are some very practical steps, strategies, and formulas I can offer to my clients to help them attract better matches online, communicate in a more clear and concise way, broaden their social network, and implement traditional courtship principles as a way of showing respect and creating a strong foundation for an lasting relationship. This is the easy part and the one every turns to first. It's human nature. I know the importance and necessity of creating an impressive online profile and presence and let's face it, it's necessary if you want to be seen for who you are by standing out among the chaos of online dating. I help my clients with these very practical steps but to really attract an ideal partner, the deep inner work is about having a dating mindset for success knowing and believing you have the ability to find the love and create the relationship you deeply desire.
For instance, opening yourself up to sign up for a online dating site is not the equivalent of opening yourself up to love again. Why? Let me explain. Because opening yourself up to love again is a declaration that you are ready for a relationship which will require you to trust again, be willing to forgive, embrace transparency and vulnerability, and live your authentic truth about your feelings, desires, and dreams. Sure, we could put a bandage on the wound and write a stellar online profile BUT that would not be the same as forgiving an ex, being open to attract a lasting love into your life, trusting someone new, believing you are totally worthy of the amazing partner you have attracted, or allowing yourself to be authentic and vulnerable.